Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Turning 40? Life Is Just Beginning!

Dear Tazi:

My 40th birthday is fast approaching, and I feel like I have accomplished nothing in life. I am a stay-at-home-Mom to four children who consume most of my free time. I have a few hobbies that I participate in with the other SAH-Moms in my circle, but I feel like I am not making much of a difference in the world. In my twenties, I graduated college and planned to change the world, first by marching on Washington, then by being elected to Congress! Well, marriage and children changed all that and the only thing I have been changing for the last ten years is diapers.

I feel like I am of no use - washed up before my time, with nothing to contribute and no major accomplishments on which to brag or be remembered. My husband has a fulfilling career and is well-respected in our community; he will probably run for City Council in the next election, following my dream of making change...and leaving me, once again, on the sidelines to watch.

I know I should be grateful for my husband and children and the good life I have, but I feel like all these years have been wasted time; like I have not left my mark on the world. Twenty years ago I imagined I would have run for office, run a marathon, or run my own business. Now, I feel like I can hardly run my own life. My friends all seem so happy being SAH-Moms and I feel like there is something wrong with me for wanting more. They say life beings at 40, and that 40 is the new 30. Is it? Right now, I sure hope-so, because I feel like I will have the do-over I desperately need.

Almost 40, and Not McLovin' It

Dear Almost 40 and Not McLovin' It:

I am printing your letter on Wednesday, May 15th for a very special reason - because it is my Mommie's 40th birthday! Normally, she would be moping about growing older and wondering how life has passed her by, as she does on every birthday, but not this year! Last year, a serious health scare helped her put it all into perspective!

You say that being a SAH-Mom leaves you with no way to have an affect on the world around you. Are you kidding me? You are helping to mold the next generation! Your children will live what they learn - what you teach them! What bigger influence is there than to be a Mom and to raise another human being? Your influence will help your child be a strong, independent thinker or a meek, go-along to get-along type of person. You can teach your sons to respect women or to treat them like possessions; you can teach your daughters to respect themselves or to accept lesser treatment as a way of life.

Everyone has to make choices in life; it is almost impossible to "Lean In" unless you have the financial back-up and managerial clout required to make it all happen at once. That does not mean that you can't start small, though. Everyone has to start somewhere...if you start at the bottom you can only move upward!

You have a college degree, and that is a start to making your dreams come true. Are there volunteer positions where you can put it to use? You seem to like politics; what is keeping you from getting involved? If you do not feel ready to run for office, why not help to run a campaign? There is no reason for you to be left on the sidelines watching.

World renown author "Jen" of published her first book at the age of 40, and now at 41 has a second book published and a contract for two more books! I suggest you hop on over to her website to read her inspiring story, and hysterical blogs about being a Mom to two young children! Life does not begin at 40, or any other set age for that matter. Life begins when we take the steps towards achieving our dreams, and stop listening to the naysayers who hold us back - even if the naysayer is the voice in our own head.


P.S. to my Mommie: Happy 40th birthday to my favorite crazy cat lady! --T.K.

I can haz a few friends over for party?

Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

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