Friday, May 2, 2014

Things Aren't Always Written In The Stars

Dear Tazi:

For the last four months I have been seeing a man who is a big believer in astrology, which I am not. Before I met "Leo" I did not even know what my sign was, which is actually how we met. He used that lame pick-up line on me, "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"; which I thought he was using ironically and was charmed by it. It turns out, he was using it seriously, and I am not certain what to think! Neither of us is a child, Tazi - we are both well into our thirties.

At first, I found Leo's comments on my personality and habits quirky. He would say I do certain things or react a certain way because of my astrological sign. This habit soon got annoying and has reached a point where I can barely tolerate it. In every other aspect, our relationship is great; but is has only been a few months. I am concerned that when we go through a rough patch he will start blaming our problems and problem behaviors on our astrological backgrounds, instead of actually working through our issues. This issue is the one thing that is holding me back from committing myself to Leo. When I try to discuss the matter with him, he digs deeper by saying it is in my sign's nature to worry about bridges we may never have to cross. I am on the fence about which way to go with Leo, and would like an outside opinion. What do you think, Tazi?

Ready To "Sign" Out

Dear Ready To "Sign" Out:

Astrology is one of those things that some people look to for fun and others look to for guidance of their every move. Just the other day, my horoscope (I am a Cancer) told me that "loud noises can't hurt" me. I was shocked because I am quite skittish, and any loud noise sends me running for cover, including the sound if Mommie emptying the utensils from the dishwasher that morning! However, my horoscope has yet to tell me that a full-day nap is in order; so I tend not to follow the advice it gives me. I am still not completely convinced that loud noises won't hurt me, either...

If after four months of dating you are still uncertain about whether or not you wish to commit to Leo I would not hold out much hope for this relationship. The fact that Leo seems consumed by astrology and that you pay no mind to it puts the two of you at opposite extremes, so I can see why Leo's beliefs would get on your nerves as he tries to sell you on them. The same can occur when a couple does not share the same religious beliefs and/or fervor.

I would say to just ignore Leo's badgering if it were not for the fact that he used his astrological beliefs to brush off a valid concern of yours. This reaction is rather telling, and could very well be a sign of a different kind, with regard to Leo's personality. Expect him to continue to refer to his beliefs in astrology, regardless of the topic at hand; and get used to having your world turned upside down during Mercury-retrograde, which is something most Astrologers take very seriously as they believe it causes havoc in daily life.

Knowing that Leo's beliefs in astrology are unlikely to change and are most likely to control various aspects of your relationship, do you think you could learn to accept Leo's views as equally valid as your own? If that question made you burst into laughter, then you know the answer to your question. If, on the other hand, your first response was to give serious consideration to the question at hand, there is hope for a relationship between you and Leo if you are both willing to accept the beliefs of the other. Just as important as you understanding Leo's beliefs is his understanding and acceptance of your lack of belief in astrology. Once you have answers to these questions, you should feel more comfortable committing to Leo...or walking away from him. The choice is yours, regardless of what your horoscope advises.


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

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