Sunday, June 22, 2014

Repost: Tazi's Corner: Issue #1 - Adventures In Unemployment

Tazi’s Corner
Life as Your Pet Sees It!

As a housecat, I have realized that I need to expand my horizons if I was to see the world of humans so I screwed up my courage and jumped into my Mommie’s soft and cozy hobo bag and stowed away whenever she went out to explore the wide world of humans. What I saw piqued my curiosity (I am lucky I wasn't killed by it!) so I perked up my ears and listened to see if anything interesting was being said. A lot of people were talking about needing jobs and wanting to find jobs, but few actually seemed to want to work. Here is a transcript of one conversation I overheard:

Woman: Oh, I am so glad I ran into you! You know so many people and have so many resources, and I need to find a job fast! My unemployment benefits are running out! Do you know anyone who is hiring?

Mommie: Probably; what kind of work are you looking for?

Woman: Anything. I will do anything. I need a paycheck.

Mommie: The tutoring center at the community college needs qualified…[woman cuts off Mommie in mid-sentence!]

Woman: Oh, no. I don’t want to tutor. I can’t stand working with people who just don’t get it.

Mommie: Okay…I was just speaking with the Director of a local pre-school; she is looking for Teaching Assistants to work with the pre-schoolers. She is willing to train the right person, too.

Woman: Oh, no. I hate working with kids.

Mommie: Well, I guess that means you are not the right person. What is your career field?

Woman: Communications

Mommie: Great! The advertising firm where I used to work is always looking for new Account Executives, and they are willing to train, too.

Woman: H[eck], no! I do NOT do sales!

Mommie: [now exasperated] I just came from Wal-Mart and saw that they are hiring.

Woman: Ugh, I would rather work in sales than work for Wal-Mart.

Mommie: Well, what it is you want to do for work? What are you qualified to do?

Woman: Anything, I’ll do anything…

Obviously not, considering that Mommie gave her four leads for entry-level or will-train jobs and she turned them all down! It’s no wonder her unemployment benefits are about to end! The conversation continued from there in a familiar vein. Mommie works for a very good employer, a place where everyone wants to work.

Woman: Are they hiring where you work? How do I get a job there?

Mommie: We are always hiring, it just depends on for what.

Woman: I told you, anything; I just need a JOB!

Mommie: But what are your qualifications?

Woman: I have a great work ethic!

Okay, so we all know that was a lie! Mommie continued to probe, asking if the woman had a CNA license (no); any kind of specialized training (no); bookkeeping skills (no); secretarial and/or computer skills (double no); a college degree (no); or professional licensing of any kind (no). Would she be willing to work in housekeeping? (Again, no; she “wasn’t so desperate” that she would clean toilets).

Mommie: Well, I’m not certain what it is you could do for work; maybe you could meet with a job counselor at the unemployment office?

Woman: No, those people are worthless. Too bad you couldn’t help me, either. Keep me in mind if you hear about any job openings?

I heard Mommie mumble “Don’t hold your breath” as she walked away. Paw slaps of disgust to those who are not willing to take the job offered because it is not the job that they want. Employers want people with experience - and experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want!

Snuggles to everyone else,

P.S. On second thought...

Big thank-you's to regular reader and fellow blogger
Maya Lincoln for sending this pic to me!

Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

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