Friday, April 17, 2015

After The Wedding, It Is REALLY Time To Grow Up!

Dear Tazi:

When I was a child, a unicorn was my imaginary friend. I would watch My Little Pony cartoons and wish I could be magically transported to the land of Ponyville where I could live with all the ponies and their friends. I am now an adult and am preparing to be married. My fiancé is unaware of my imaginary friend, but he is aware of my love of unicorns and has graciously given in to having a unicorn and rainbow themed wedding. The reception hall will be decorated like Ponyville and the wedding favors will be My Little Pony ponies with our names and wedding date airbrushed on the sides.


Welcome to Ponyville!


I realize that all of this sounds like a dream come true, but I am afraid it will all turn into a nightmare after my husband discovers that I have a stuffed unicorn and My Little Pony collection big enough to fill a good sized basement. My mother has held onto my collection for me, but has always said that once I am married with a place of my own she wants her basement back. My fiancé owns his own home, and it is into his house we will be moving after the wedding. His basement is furnished and has a huge bar with a sports theme throughout, including many signed collectibles. I couldn’t possibly ask him to make room for Ponyville – his friends are already giving him a hard time about the Ponyville themed wedding.

Could you please print my letter in your column? I am hoping that my fiancé will see it and realize how important my unicorn and My Little Pony collection is to me, and that he will then offer me room to re-create Ponyville alongside his sports kingdom. It’s the only way I can think of to save Ponyville!

Sincerely,
Pony Girl

Dear Pony Girl:

Men everywhere are going to hate me for printing this letter, but here it is anyway – but only because Hasbro, a Rhode Island based company, makes My Little Pony and I never miss an opportunity to promote a local enterprise.

If you are afraid to ask your fiancé/husband directly for something that should tell you that your request is probably a selfish one. Put yourself in his shoes: Would you give up your Ponyville wedding for a sports-themed extravaganza, complete with mini football helmets for favors? I didn’t think so; therefore, I give my full support to the resounding “NO!” that your fiancé is going to give you. As for what happens to Ponyville, that is up to you and your mother. If she wants her basement back, I suggest you box it up and rent a storage facility; or better yet donate your collection to the local children’s hospital, so a new generation of children can enjoy these wonderful toys and so you can feel the fulfillment that comes with letting go in order to help others.

Snuggles,
Tazi

P.S. Your fiancé sounds like a saint!


Ask Tazi! is ghostwritten by a human with a Bachelors of Arts in Communications. Tazi-Kat is not really a talking feline.

6 comments:

  1. Where are you, Tazi?? I miss you so much!

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  2. Tazi, we need some more advice! You are the first advice-giving cat I've come across. One burning question from a "friend of mine" (not from me, I swear): what's wrong with my kids? All they do is yell and scream at each other all day long. Do you think it's that one of them just entered into tweenhood? Ugh...

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  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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